I don’t do roommates

Slowly returning to consciousness I felt dirty. Not an entirely new feeling. I live a messy life. I felt something on my face, there were specs all over. I tried to lift my arm but couldn’t, it was stuck.  I panicked, I couldn’t move anything at all. I realized I could barley breath. Calming as best as I could, I did the only thing I could: I listened. There was shuffling mixed with steady breathing and a crunching noise. Out of no where something stabbed me in the side causing me to shriek in pain. Everything froze after that. After a few moments the thing that had stuck me was removed and there was a swift thud. Things moved faster after that. More stuff flew, I could feel added pressure as more pieces landed on my face as they were removed from where I was hit.

Then I felt a hand. It brushed along my stomach removing whatever held me pinned down. Again they froze as they found my body. Then they worked double time as they progressed up my body until they finally found my face. With a few sweeps the mess was removed. Only then did I open my eyes. I realized I was encased in dirt and knelling above me was a dark figure. I couldn’t make him out. There were work lights shining behind him, blinding out his features.

“We’ve been looking for you for a long time Clara,” the gruff voice offered. He stretched his hands towards me, taking care to move slowly. He splayed his hands out in front of me to show he wasn’t going to harm me. Then he reached out and pulled something from my mouth. It must have been some sort of breathing device because as soon as he removed it there was the dank taste of swampy earth. Once he had the device free he continued his progress by digging out my arms and legs. Once he was finished he pulled me into a sitting position.

His voice sounded almost smug as he whispered conspiratorially, “Welcome back to the land of the living.”

“Who are you?” I croaked. My throat burned from disuse. How long had I been here? Where was ‘here’, anyway?

“The time for questions is ahead of us, but first we need to get out of here.”


“Question in the future, like I said. All you need to know right now is that if we don’t bet out of here in the next five minutes you’ll be back in your grave. This time without your little EasyAir5000 and likely with a roommate. No offense, but I don’t do roommates, so lets be off.”



Found via Reddit.
Prompt: I awoke to find a mysterious figure digging me out from a grave.


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